BEN'S DAWGS

Bless his heart. Benjie wrote his own shoe commentary. I would preface his analysis with the observation, for those who don't know, that Benjie has Fred Flintstone feet — completely flat and blocky like a blue-collar Bedrock man; however, to my knowledge, he cannot propel a car with them:



Starting at Maggie's tail and going counterclockwise, we have:

Brown French Walking Shoes

Black Work Boots (they are made to be casual boots, but they are the toughest shoes I have, so I use them for heavy-duty booting)

Lawn-Mowin' New Balance Running Shoes

Big Lesbian Shoes

Shiny Black Dress Shoes

White New Balance Walking Shoes (I don't wear them because they peench my feet)

Tuxedo Shoes (black plastic shoes)

Hush Puppies Brand Cordovan Cap-Toe Dress Shoes (my favorite shoes)

White New Balance Walking Shoes (the ones I wear every day -- note laces)

Weird Black Dress Shoes (Don Suffron gave them to me)

K-Swiss Sandals (I can't wear them because I can't put my special insoles on them)

Good Black Dress Shoes (the ones I wore to work, alternating with the cordovan dress shoes)

New Balance Running Shoes (the latest ones I tried a couple of years ago — I can't run because of the flat feet, but these are specially made for flat feet, so I tried until my shins fell apart as usual; note that they have no laces — when the laces broke in my everyday shoes, I took the ones from these shoes until they broke also, then I bought the ones with the red stripe)

Also note that I have three pairs of special insoles, and they are in the big lesbian shoes, the tux shoes, and the everyday sneakers. The lesbian shoes have them because they are my second most used shoes and the tux shoes have them because I don't like to have to switch out my insoles right before a performance. And I have three pairs of shoe trees, in the boots, the tux shoes, and the cordovans. I have them in the cordovans because, when I was an attorney, I would always put a pair in the dress shoes I was wearing right after work (I would wear the cordovans and the black dress shoes on alternating days). I have a pair in the tux shoes because they are a little small, and I keep those in there so they don't shrink, and I have a pair in the boots because the last time I wore them I sweated a lot, and those cedar trees are good for keeping moisture from ruining leather.

So that's the story on my shoes.